Saturday, February 28, 2015

“…Will Set You Free.” by Noah S. R. De Luzuriaga

 Hello, gentlemen and-…no ladies? Figured not. Not just a secret new world order, noooo, you’re a sexist secret new world order. Ahem, my apologies, esteemed autocrats, let me introduce myself. My name is Mickey Doherty the third, proud descendant of ideological crusaders dating back since the dawn of humanity. 

 For generations, my forefathers have fought for the truth, the whole truth, and nothing BUT the truth. The truth that YOU, with your money, lies and vaccinations, have kept hidden from the people. The truth, that you have managed to lock up inside your underground vaults, sky cities and lunar colonies. 


 Ahem. But you know all of that. You probably know everything, every scrap of human history, every thought that has gone through the head of every member of Homo Sapiens Sapiens on this planet.


 Even now, hehe, your top scientists have yet to pierce my consciousness, you wanna know why? It’s the tinfoil implants under my scalp. You took away all my tools, all my defenses, but you didn’t see that coming, did ya?! 

 Oh I’m sure you can remove it now, but that doesn’t matter. The damage is done, and this time, you are not recovering. No coverup, no purge, no filtering of any sort will stop the truth from getting out. You have no one but yourselves to blame. You’ve gotten complacent, careless, and my network has managed to grow, right under your noses!

 But I digress. I suppose, before the world breaks out in total revolt against your despotic grip, and finally shakes you off, you’ll want to know how I managed to defeat you. 

 I’ll tell you. Oh mama, will I tell you. It all boils down to one word, you see.


 Yes, a leak! Ha! You smug tyrants, thinking your control over us was so absolute, you never expected an inside job! It appears that one of you has some sense of decency, unhindered by human cruelty, reptilian cunning, and alien genetics. 

It was on March 22nd, 2019, yes, I remember the date exactly, that I was approached. Me, Mickey Doherty the third, approached to free humanity from its prison!

It was a sunny day, that March 22nd, I must commend your weather machines for doing such a fine job, and on this sunny day, I was in my tent, foil – lined of course, working on my pigeon laser, which I had happened to extract from some files from one of your labs in Poland. Going outside to refill my oxygen canister, I saw a cat. 

 I’m afraid I can’t recall exactly how I realized it was an agent of yours, perhaps it was the triangle on its collar, or maybe the fact that the cadence of its purrs, when put to morse code, spelled out the opening passage of “1984” in Latin. 
 Yes, we have broken that particular code. Anyway, what matters is that I did know, and I knew, despite all my best efforts, I had been found.

Your blasted cat knocked me to the ground before I could raise my weapon, and throttled me into unconsciousness. 

 When I came to, butt naked and hanging upside down in one of your lightless cells, I knew that I was going to die. I was scared then. 

 Not now, I’m not afraid of you bastards now, but back then, I was terrified. To die like some NOBODY, at the hands of the puppeteers, with nothing to my name! You can bet your collective shadowy asses I was terrified. 

 Then, suddenly, out of a door of light, a figure entered. A man! Probably. Not really sure, in hindsight. Regardless, this…figure, told me that he or she was one of you. I tried to activate the cyanide capsule in my tooth, but it had already been removed. I thrashed, and struggled. My source, your traitor, calmed me by promising me what I wanted most. The truth.

Your leak let me down, and gave me back my hat, my suit, my thermometer, even my instant death capsule. With not a single world more, he directed me towards a computer. This computer, you see, was the sum of everything you were, yes I’m using the past tense, seeing how your organization is about to keel over. 

 This computer had EVERYTHING on you. Every assassination, every celebrity scandal, every famine, every insidious toothpaste ad! The Christmas season mass hypnosis, the stock market crash, global warming, all YOU! And now I had the proof. I had not known true happiness until that moment, esteemed committee of slavemongers, I was so giddy, I barely felt the hypodermic needle in my neck. 

 Sigh….you bastards really can’t do things the easy way, can you? Not even your turncoats. When I woke up from the effects of the drug, I was next to my tent, with a USB in my hand. That’s when I knew things were going to get very fun. For myself, I mean, obviously not for you.

The rest of the story, you may know, surely you must have picked up on it. You’ve got eyes, ears and noses in every nook and cranny of this planet. It took months of proper encryption, preparation and planning before I could even THINK of distributing this information. I had to call on every ally, all of my contacts. The ones in the underground, those behind enemy lines in corporate media, every guerrilla journalist, activist and agitator that has ever fought for your exposure, I called, they came. I promised them the motherlode and they answered.

Soon, the networks us warriors of freedom had built up over the centuries was spreading the news, the truth, to all corners of the globe. You cracked down quickly, but every show of force only revealed yourselves further. You managed to catch me with your clever disappearing toilet trap in New York, you’ve questioned me, and now you will kill me.

I’ve told you everything that matters. I will die a happy man. You will die as monsters deserve, in the fires of justice. 

 I found the truth, and the truth has broken you.

 Good day, gentlemen.  

( Image borrowed from : )